It seems fitting and like divine intervention that I would be writing the blog this week. So, grab a cup of coffee or tea and have seat. I have a story to tell you, and it’s a humdinger.
Almost five years ago, I responded harshly to someone I love, and I lost them. Instead of erring on the side of love, I chose fear and distance. Instead of reflection and grace, I chose immediate judgment and shaming. Five years ago, I lost someone I loved due to lack of knowledge and self-preservation.
From the day my stepson walked out of our lives, I have questioned everything I ever said, everything I ever thought, and every word left unspoken. It’s be a half a decade of prayer, scripture, more prayer, and reflection. There have been many tears, many arguments, much judgement from others, lines drawn and hatred spewed. There has been the burial of pain, the pushing aside of a love buried deep down. Restoration was the impossible prayer that left my lips daily.
God was working. He was working on our family. He was working in my life. He was moving the mountains I built up in my unbelief. The rocks I had placed and stacked up from self- preservation and fear, He began to take down–one by one. I was praying for heart change for others, when of course, the heart change was happening in me.
This summer God began a new thing in my stepson and in my family. He began releasing us and restoring us. He opened our eyes and ears to hear new things. My prayers began to change. I prayed that I would see my stepson through God’s eyes. I prayed for a change of my heart. I prayed for others to have walls broken down around me, so we could begin restoration.
This Thanksgiving, I sat next to my stepson at the Thanksgiving table. I saw him through the eyes of a blessed and proud step-momma. I got to squeeze him tight, and listen to him tell stories of what I had missed. All day I stared at a miracle. Have you ever looked into the face of a miracle (and hours of prayer) unfold in front of you? To see what God is actively doing play out right in front of your shocked face?
It was the most precious day of my year. I could never, ever have planned for this to happen in this way. God’s plan is always always always better than ours. He had been working this out for years. He had heard my prayers, seen my tears, heard my heartfelt confessions…and He responded. Even when I didn’t deserve a second chance, He provided a way.
You may be praying today for something that seems impossible, too. It may appear there is no way. And there may not be a way here on Earth, but God doesn’t work within our boundaries. He is uncontainable, and He can and will move in ways that will light your life up and turn your world upside down. However, you must be willing and praying and looking for ways to work alongside Him. As Psalm 107: 28-30 says:
“Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he delivered them from their distress.
He made the storm be still,
and the waves of the sea were hushed.
Then they were glad that the waters were quiet, and he brought them to their desired haven.”
I knew prayers were answered, but I forgot what it was like to watch them unfold before my eyes. Have you forgotten that, too? Let me remind you in this season of HOPE that you serve alongside the God who tells mountains to stay, winds to rise up, seas to calm down– the God who brings the prodigal son home to your table when you thought it impossible.
Keep praying, keep expecting, keep seeking Him with your days. He is still writing the story, dear sister. Let go of the pen and see what He will do.